Saturday, June 8, 2013

Things That Are Fun

There are lots of things that are fun.

Then there are things that are not fun. Here is my list:

  1. Powdered creamer. Don't ever buy this. Don't offer me coffee if all you have is powdered creamer. This is not fun.
  2. Children at a wedding. It's not fun for the parents. It's not fun for the single folks trying to get lucky. It's not fun for the bride who has planned this thing down to every detail. Get babysitters.
  3. Bone-in wings. Mess and little meat.
  4. Coasters are not fun. Coasters make me nervous. There are never enough coasters so I end up holding my drink the whole time.
  5. Cash bar/tipping is not fun. Did I tip enough? Am I a jerk? Did I tip too much? Am I a jerk? I never carry cash anyway. Just let me buy drinks in advance and let me get drunk without fumbling in my purse.
  6. Speaking of purses, round-back chairs are not fun because I can't hang on my purse on them. What am I supposed to do, put my purse on the table top and knock over my drink?
  7. Role play isn't fun. I don't use it in my workshops because it isn't fun. It never teaches the lesson you're trying to teach because everyone's so nervous about their role play performance it just teaches people how to waste time.
  8. 'No gifts please' parties. LAME. Gifts are fun. Showing up other people with my awesome gifts is fun.
  9. 'Phones off, please.' That's not fun. I need to get texts about the trouble my kids are causing. I might tweet about your presentation. I might buy you a gift on Amazon (see #8). 
  10. Parking meters are not fun. They are a pain in my ass.

Playground are fun
Being queen is fun


Dancing is fun
Drinking good wine is fun